Lesson Number One: Wisdom

Your author passes on lessons in wisdom to the younger generations.

by Cam Marston

My daughter graduated from college in May. It occurred to me that after more than 20 years advising corporations and more than seven years interviewing workplace leaders on my What’s Working with Cam Marston radio show and podcast, I should have some advice to offer her as she goes on to what’s next. You can follow my lessons on my LinkedIn page or via my Substack.

Workplace Lesson #1: Wisdom Is More Important Than Smarts (and You Can’t Accelerate It)

Last Wednesday, after giving a speech in Atlanta, a young man asked me how to deal with his Gen Z employee. The employee had been on his team for a year and felt ready for a promotion that would give him leadership responsibility. Otherwise, the young man told me, the employee was threatening to find a new job.

I’ve heard this question asked for about 10 years now. First, it was Millennials asking this of Gen X leaders. Today, it’s Gen Z asking it of Millennial leaders.

What’s Happened?

We’ve raised our children in a culture of affirmation, praise and reward. Since their birth, both Millennials and Gen Z-ers have been applauded for nearly everything they’ve done. They didn’t ask for this – their parents (people like me) decided to do it, thinking it was the right thing. We celebrated everything and told them how remarkable they were for simply doing what was asked.

Today, we’re paying the piper. The next generations think they’re ready for a big reward – leading a team – simply for following instructions for an arbitrary amount of time. Since they haven’t been fired, reprimanded or caused any big problems in their short job tenure, they reason they’re ready to be promoted to leadership – or else.

But in selecting leaders, workplace leadership seeks wisdom, not just competence or compliance. After a year on the job, most employees are only beginning to show competence. Wisdom in the workplace means not simply knowing how to do the job – that’s often the easiest part – but knowing when, where, why and who. And that takes time spent observing, getting to know people and understanding the system. Another word for all that is wisdom.

“To acquire knowledge, one must study; but to acquire wisdom, one must observe.” – Marilyn vos Savant

Wisdom Can’t Be Accelerated

Well, it can – but the cost is too great. Catastrophic loss creates wisdom. The death of loved ones creates wisdom. Losing a job creates wisdom. Having a stroke on a treadmill and thinking I wouldn’t live to see my children grow old – but miraculously living through it – creates wisdom. But none of these are things we wish upon others.

Wisdom takes time, patience and observation. And from what I’ve seen, wisdom is less about what to do, and more often about what not to do:

• What not to say
• What not to write
• How not to begin something
• Whose attention you don’t want
• How not to lead
• How not to criticize

Wisdom is, as my uncle used to say, “learning through the flames.” Getting burned, realizing what happened and why and making sure it doesn’t happen again.

Wisdom is also about learning about yourself:

• What are you good at?
• What do you enjoy?
• What are your weaknesses, and how can you remedy them?• What kind of advice do you need, and from whom?
• What part of your work do you love and want to master?

Even the most brilliant Gen Z employee with the highest college GPA (or Millennial 10 years ago, or Gen Xer 20 years ago) can’t know these answers until they’ve lived them. There’s no shortcut. No hack. No substitute for time.

In fact, the employee who says, “Since I’ve been on the job for a year, I’ve got what it takes to lead a team,” is showing a significant lack of self-awareness – and therefore, an absence of wisdom.

So, Guidance for My Glorious Daughter

Like so many in your generation, you’ll become impatient for whatever is next. You’ll feel you’ve spent enough time doing your job that you deserve a reward. You’ve done well enough not to break anything in your workplace. In high school, college and volleyball, doing well enough got you rewarded. Those days are likely over. And you’re not to blame for expecting otherwise – your mother, your coaches, your teachers and I helped wire you this way. I’m sorry. We thought we were doing the right thing. We didn’t know what we were doing.

I could tell you that the early part of your career will be just a blip on the timeline of your life, and that years from now, you’ll barely remember it. But I know that doesn’t help you today. You want to know what to do right now. I get it.

So, Here’s What You Do

1. Focus on what you’re learning. Not just how to fulfill the job to the satisfaction of your leaders (though that is important), but how the people and the place work.

• What do you observe about the best leaders that makes them effective and likable? Listen. Watch. Notice the small things. What behaviors of theirs can you try on for size?
• Who are the persuasive people in your workplace who aren’t bosses? What makes them persuasive – for good and for bad? What good persuasions can you experiment with?
• Who’s that one team member everyone goes to for ideas or support? What makes them the go-to? Steal their playbook.
• Is there someone on the team who’s disliked? Why? What do they do – and how can you avoid it?

2. Make it known that you want more. This won’t accelerate wisdom, but it will put you in places to gain more of it.

• Whenever someone important in the organization says, “I need some help” or “I need a volunteer,” raise your hand – especially if it’s someone you don’t already know well. Your colleagues may accuse you of being a brown-noser. Ignore them.
• Make it known that you’re eager to learn. Bring training and development ideas to your leaders, and be ready to say, “Here’s how I think this content will help me do my ob better today,” to justify the cost or the time.
• Ask your leaders: “Are there any responsibilities I can take on that would make your job easier and help me learn?” You’ll see a look of surprise on their faces and, likely, new responsibilities coming your way.

3. Meet people.

• Within your organization. Outside your organization. Listen to them. Notice not just what they say, but what they avoid saying.
• Don’t hesitate to ask why. Too often, people are afraid of asking because they think it makes them appear dumb. Don’t be afraid – you’ll learn more than you think.
• Why did it work?
• Why did it not work?
• Why did you do that?
• Why didn’t you do something different?
• Or just: Why?
• Speak less. Always work to speak less. Asking good questions helps.

Now, Onward…

Wisdom lessons will come your way, but you must pay attention to catch them. Keep your eyes up. Keep your ears on. Adopt the best behaviors and turn them into habits. Stop watching the clock or counting the days. Your time will come.

Show up. Observe everything. Immediately change your behavior when you see a better way to do something – or a better way to treat someone.

And slowly, surely, you’ll gain the wisdom that turns a worker into a leader.

Up next, Lesson #2: So You Want to Make a Lot of Money?

Cam Marston, features interviews with business leaders across the country. Marston now offers a two-and-a-half￾day Communications Academy for deep dive learning about workplace and intergenerational communications. Learn more at CamMarston.com/GICA.